What happens in marriage when you are faced with a life altering decision, and you and your spouse do not agree on the direction to go. Biblically the husband is the head of the house, so all final decisions rest with him, but what do you do when you know the decision he may have made is the wrong one? Before the girls left, I knew their mother would not be able to take care of them, and would regret having taken them back. Once the money ran out, and she found herself still homeless, she would get to a point where she would turn over her children once again. After only two months, and having spent most of those two months sleeping in her truck with 6 of her children (including the girls), she finally came to the point of giving up. When George and I agreed to take the girls in, he said if their mother were to ever take them back, the girls could not return to us, under no circumstances. I never agreed with that idea, and we discussed it even until this day. I came up with several scenarios where I felt his rule needed to bend, but once George has made a decision, he sticks to it no matter how outdated or inhumane it may be. I don't know if it has to do with admitting he was wrong (which he has not learned to do either) or he can not stand to get attached to them to have them taken away (which it seems to be more of than anything). He wanted to have their mother's parental rights stripped, but having voluntarily given up her children, there was no court that would do that; and the amount of money we would have to spend in order to hire an attorney in order to prove her unfit was not in our budget.
The latest news is the girls are now living with a known sexual predator (who has been incarcerated previously for rape). Him and his daughter agreed to take the girls but not the boys. I have no way of contacting their mother, or the girls. I can't help but feel like she was forced to give them to someone else because of the inhumane rule that George came up with. I'm trying not to be angry, but having recently gone off junk food and experiencing food withdrawals has my head hurting and me moody. Due to this fact, I'm not passing any judgement, and remaining silent, as anything I say may cause a huge argument. Their grandmother is so upset at finding out where her grandchildren are (with her ex husband, who was also physically abusive) that she has attempted suicide and is now in a mental facility for further observations. It is a huge ripple that seems unnecessary, I just want my girls back. We are attempting to have more children in January 2012, and the thought of procreation with someone who can dismiss children in need so easily seems a bit useless. Am I wrong? I am staying on my face in prayer, as I can not allow my emotions and thoughts to consume me, but I can not end this with agreeing to disagree. What else can I do?
The latest news is the girls are now living with a known sexual predator (who has been incarcerated previously for rape). Him and his daughter agreed to take the girls but not the boys. I have no way of contacting their mother, or the girls. I can't help but feel like she was forced to give them to someone else because of the inhumane rule that George came up with. I'm trying not to be angry, but having recently gone off junk food and experiencing food withdrawals has my head hurting and me moody. Due to this fact, I'm not passing any judgement, and remaining silent, as anything I say may cause a huge argument. Their grandmother is so upset at finding out where her grandchildren are (with her ex husband, who was also physically abusive) that she has attempted suicide and is now in a mental facility for further observations. It is a huge ripple that seems unnecessary, I just want my girls back. We are attempting to have more children in January 2012, and the thought of procreation with someone who can dismiss children in need so easily seems a bit useless. Am I wrong? I am staying on my face in prayer, as I can not allow my emotions and thoughts to consume me, but I can not end this with agreeing to disagree. What else can I do?
Pray Andrea, pray. As a male victim myself during my early childhood for over six years I can relate to the toll abuse, rape, and torture takes on a child but I can also be a witness to the awesome power of God's love and healing hand. By all accounts I should be a monster, a predator, and a junkie (I was forced to use heroine as a child to calm me down during the rape) and though I wasn't spared the hell I lived through for six years, I was spared the hell a life of a junkie would have imposed because I was spared from addiction. To this day I have no desire to use any drugs and I only drink alcohol on rare occasions, never developed the taste for it like all my friends did. Whatever happens, God can make something positive from it, just have faith and pray. Pray for those girls, pray for their mother, and pray for your husband. God will never fail you or them. Remember the story of Job.
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